Finals are over, so I'm devoting most of my Christmas break to writing. Unfortunately, my laptop crashed, taking all my writing files with it. The files can be salvaged, but unfortunately I don't have access to the 35 pages I have written of Dark City, my steampunk novel. I'm going to write a short story set in the city while I'm waiting for my files to come back, and if they still haven't been retrieved, I'm going to probably continue. I don't remember the exact sentence I left off with, but I do usually remember pretty well where I did leave off. So I'll continue maybe a chapter or several paragraphs down the line and fill in later. No biggie.

My boyfriend is also doing character art for the novel, which pleases me greatly. He's only done the protagonist so far, but he also wants to make a comic strip out of my short story, so... that'll be really awesome to see. I realy want to write this like I did River of the Gods at the beginning of the year. As in finishing it in record time. I want to make it AWESOME and I want to query more than a few agents with it. Hopefully I'm ahead of the game on this steampunk thing. The fashion is getting extremely popular at the conventions, and I've only seen a couple novels. In any case, I'm not writing it to follow trends, or to try and get in on the market, I'm writing it because I genuinely love steampunk and want to get this story out.

Plus, I have someone drawing pretty pictures for me! Win!

Hopefully, I'll be confident enough in Dark City to continue trying to get an agent with it, unlike my debacle with River of the Gods. That one needs to be rewritten (AGAIN) before I'd want to sell it. It's way too formulaic. Hopefully Dark City isn't.

Titles are strange for me. A lot of times I can't come up with some that stick or resonate. My Lovely is an expection, as are the rest that I have planned for that series. The titles fit so well with what I have planned, that I haven't changed any of them (though My Lovely was originally called Angel of Music, which fit better before I changed everything).

It took me a bit of finagling to work out the titles in the Dreamstrifer Chronicles, and unfortunately I think I lost them all when my desktop crashed. Oh well.

My short story, "To Catch a Thief" was a rare occasion when I came up with the perfect title on my first try. My unfinished NaNo from last year, No Other Gods Before Me was another rarity.

The River of Gods never quite fit perfectly, and since I'm pushing that to the backburner to percolate before I rewrite it, I don't much mind.

Stille Nacht will probably confuse everyone, but I love that title dearly and don't want to lose it. It's German, which make sense because the antagonist is a German Vampire, but... eh, who knows. It's not entirely difficult to pronounce (even if you leave off the pronounced 'e' on stille). Who knows, if I ever write it.


I still want to write Savior Leviathan and Labyrinthine, two more titles that slowly came to me. I don't know if I"ll keep them as novels or write them as short stories, but I love the titles.

But there is one story I've been working on since I was about 13. It's had different names. Ones I can't remember, the Dragon Mage, Eluvataria, and most recently, Kyaharen. I'm rewriting the dang thing for the seventh time (give or take), and was thinking of titling it Kyaharen: Among the Shadows but that sounded cheesy, even to me. As I was filling out my sig for the NaNo forums, I looked up the poem I wrote for the book. In the story, there's a method of fortune telling involving glass marble-like orbs.

Part of the rhyme goes:

Smoke for Shadow
Ne'er cast
Clear for calm
Ne'er last

I had a title.

It fit, perfectly, and as soon as I ventured the idea of using it for the title, I knew it was a winner. I love it, more than I probably should.

My NaNo this year is a story very dear to me, with a brand spanking new name.

I'm writing Smoke for Shadow, and I can't wait to write Syran, Eluvataria, Kadin, Sandric, Regen, and most of all, Desiel and Ritksa again. They've been with me even longer than Solace Trine (the Dreamstrifer Chronicles: Book 1). Well, Syran and Eluvataria have, though their story and personalities have changed drastically. It's kind of like coming home.

-I think I finally am gaining steam on my latest venture. Let's hope this one doesn't screw me over fifty pages in like my last endeavors have.

-I am irrationally in love with the name Owen. So I named a Mercenary with girlie lips after him (see: Jonathon Rhys Meyers)

-I forgot how incredibly delicious homemade chai is.

-While at a continental breakfast in Nebraska, my dad remarked that my waffles (from scratch!) are better than continental breakfast waffles.

-I really like weird dream sequences in movies (a la the Buffy episode "Restless" at the end of season 4), but they have to be well done and reading them just isn't the same.

-My classes for fall are all scheduled and I'm officially a voice major.

-Hopefully this will help in writing My Lovely, whenever I get around to finishing that.

-I really shouldn't drink hot chai in the dead of summer, but it's delicious!

I broke 8K on My Lovely. Woot or something. It's not that impressive, mostly because I should be further along by now. Yay for distractions. I've had... a difficult week. I found out I have irritible bowel syndrome, I don't think I ate a full meal for days, I broke up with my boyfriend, probably pissed off said ex-boyfriend beyond reconciliation, sewed a lot on my costume, cleaned my brothers' house, and pretty much wished I was elsewhere.

I wanted to work on my costume and watch movies, but my brother once again decided he would rather sleep on my parent's couch downstairs whre all my sewing stuff is instead of staying at one of his 2 houses. If he's going to sleep at my house, can't he just stay in the guest bedroom?

Anyway, I've been trying to plot deeply for My Lovely, and it seems to be working out. Josh's personality kind of shifted from how it was in Angel of Music, and I consider that a good thing. He was too perfect, too one dimensional in the original. His dad had all the money in the world, and it wasn't even really brought up in the original. Now I'm trying to work in his family's wealth much more deeply, as someone who was raised with that much money would be. You could be the nicest person in the world but being incredibly wealthy will give you much different experiences than being middle class and they'd look at situations differently.

Aubin (who was originally Aubrey in Angel of Music) has *gasp* a personality now, and as I'm sure you might have noticed, he plays a major role in the story. And Liz has her own personality, instead of being a carbon copy of myself. She's a lot more reserved than I am, even if we have some of the same hang ups (or the hang ups I had when I was 18).

And Jay and Shawna actually have *gasp* a subplot. One that isn't resolved in this story, because I decided that if I ever get these books published, that Jay gets his own book. He deserves a happy ending, gosh darnit. Although, I should say that it's really hard for me to not skip ahead and write Aubin's book, because he is by far my favorite. But I need to finish Liz's story.

I should go write. Or maybe sew, now that my brother stirred himself from the depths of sleep.

So I gave up on alchemy for awhile (due to my attention span shifting like woah lately), and am now working in earnest on My Lovely. I guess I needed a huge dose of reality or something.

I love Aubin so hard. It almost makes me wish he were real. :-) Oh well, his voice is as real as I can make it, considering he sounds coincidentally JUST like Drew Sarich. I'm just a jerk to him, too. Aubin, not Drew. Although if I knew Drew in real life I would be in too much wide-eyed awe to be very coherent.

I had to have a colonoscopy not too long ago, and blood tests. They think I have one of three things. Crohn's Disease, Celiac Disease, or Irritable Bowel Syndrome. It's been over a week since the tests, and I have to go to the Doctor today for a follow-up. Hopefully the PA will have gotten my results, because they sure haven't called me. *grumble grumble grumble*

Oh well, I finally sort of quit my job, so hopefully I'll have a lot of time to write throughout the rest of the summer before I have to go back to school full time (and start working on the weekends again).

So there's another player in Sienna's story, one from her past. Juro Alin, famous Baritone. Heehee. He doesn't have a LOT of characterization yet, but he's tied in with Kai and Tenebrae. So he's pretty much badass. And he can sing for a very long time without breathing. So, yeah, the badass thing again.

Oooh, Alan Rickman's on TV. Die Hard, hee hee!

Anywho, I really like what I'm doing with Sienna. Originally she was going to be a very strong Christian, and then realized it didn't quite fit in with what I had established. So she's kind of a lackluster Christian. I think she'll grow into it, but for now it works. And I love Lacey. Lacey has kind of an interesting role in the story, one that Sienna doesn't fully understand.

And I'm setting up a love triangle without realizing it. Ugh. Well, I know how it's going to end up, but it was rather untintentional.

One thing I did, kind of intentionally, was make it impossible for Sienna to turn into a superslut like some urban fantasy heroines. It would completely and utterly destroy everything about her as a character. One thing I didn't plan on was how ingrained it was in her to not be into the sexy good swinging times. Sienna has anxiety problems, and it kind of morphed into more than just one kind of anxiety. She's pretty much an complete basket case, and I think the idea of a man being around her for more than a little while (who is not Jase) scares the shit out of her. This is partially explained by her back story, but isn't exactly a big traumatic thing.

In any case, I like what I"m doing. I just need to remember to put in some more here-and-now plot and not some future-big-bad-ass plot.

Which I'll do right after Sienna leaves the Symphony.

Which I should go write about now.

Current Wordcount: 12,548

So I've started in earnest on my new paranormal/urban fantasy story. It took me some doing to decide if I was going to write in third person or first person. After developing Sienna's character a bit more, I realized I HAD to write in first person. She is just one of those characters who's best served by telling the story. It kind of makes sense if you know more about her character. I guess you can say she's not a typical urban fantasy heroine, and that was rather unintentional.

Her full name is Alice Sienna Darling, and she's an alchemist. She also has anxiety problems. And she's a concert pianist. And she lives in an attic and keeps her alchemy tools under her bed because she doesn't have any space. I love writing her voice. She's so matter of fact about her issues, and she's kind of a weenie.

Of course I have my typical mysterious stranger with the mysterious gothy goth name (Tenebrae), and the friend who always looks to her for help, Jase (short for Jason).

And I haven't gotten to Kai yet, but she's the typical urban fantasy heroine who probably thinks she's the hero of the story. If I had written the story from the point of view of anyone BUT Sienna, it probably would have been third person, but as it stands, it's stuck in first and won't let me right it any other way. Which is good because I'm already 10K into it.

I'm also somewhat saddened, because I'll be going to Basic Training for the Air Force at the end of summer, and unless I have the story finished by then (I'm still debating if I want to push myself... probably not until after Jesus Christ Superstar), it won't be touched for seven weeks. Bleh. Oh well, I'll survive.

Writing during technical training's going to be a pain in the butt. Ah well, nothing I can do about it.

Note to self: Take out line about calculus, since you know absolutely nothing about calculus.

So in a last ditch flurry of writing, I wrote nearly 10K last night, and finished The River of the Gods in 104,000 words.

I'm pretty sure there'll be more added. I sent off the novel to Natalie (as she had read the first 245 pages and loved it), and then as I was reading the last bit of Grave Peril I was suddenly reminded of fifteen hundred loose ends and things I forgot to explain.

So tonight, after I practice piano, I'm going to go back and explain everything I forgot to explain (what the purpose of introducting certain characters in the second to last chapter was, why characters did what they did, etc.). And then once I explain everything, I'm going to leave it ALONE. I don't know for how long, but I'm going to start my next novel and not think about River for awhile. Then I'm going to go back and revise the hell out of it. THere are already things I want to change, so, yay!

Revisitions aren't that bad, but I'm going to be a lot more heavy handed with River han I was with Kyaharen. And then I'm going to query and synopsis and have fun.

I have to go brush my teeth for work.

Instead of getting my ideas for my new story hammered out, or getting my requisite 2-3K on tRotG hammered, out, I'm doing a MeMe!

1) Answer the questions below
2) Take each answer and type it into Google Image Search
3) Take a picture from the first page of results and post it.
4) You can't copy the persons answers who posted this before you

( Cut for size! )

So while cleaning my bedroom, I found my jump drive. Now, I'd been looking for it because it had crochet patterns I wanted, as well as a few sound and video files, and some other documents for nostaliga. And a whole slew of pictures of my nephews and niece.

What else I found made me very, very frightened.

I found the first "book" I wrote and finished. I wrote it in about three or for months when I was fifteen. I believe it's around 60,000 words long. I just remember posting it chapter by chapter onto Fanfiction.net, loooong ago when they accepted original stories. This was six years ago, people. Fanfiction.net has changed a LOT, and I don't even long on anymore. I've been meaning to just delete everything (yes, even the reviews) because that's a huge crap pile of embarrassment, right there.

Anywho, after reading three paragraphs I turned a bright shade of red, closed the window, and went back to cleaning my room. It was THAT bad. At fifteen, I was a sucky writer. As most fifteen year olds are (no offense to teenagers, but seriously? We sucked back then. Very few people can write well on their first try, or their second. Or third. Or Fourth. I've written dozens of starts to stories, and all of them suck).

I was so proud of that story back in the day. It reads like a fifteen year old who's never had a boyfriend who's only theater experience is the Phantom of the Opera (it wasn't, but I had just seen it and it stuck with me).

I started rewriting Angel of Music, massively overhauling the plot and renamed it My Lovely. I had to abandon it for the River of the Gods but I'll go back to it eventually. The characters still kind of hold a special place in my heart. They deserve a better story than I gave them.

After I cleaned for awhile, I came back to the drive and lookd at several other of my story attempts. Most of them were pretty poor, precursors to books I've written ("Eluvataria" became Kyaharen and "Tirsey" is the sequel to RotG). But one of them, while still reading amateurish, had such an interesting premise and even some good writing. It was, I think, to go along with Angel of Music, and I can rework to go along with the Music Series. The characters I'd established were interesting, the set up was clear, but I forgot what the plot was going to be. But that's okay, because I have 2/3 of what I need anyway. Good characters and potential conflict. I can let it percolate in my mind until I'm ready to write it.

I really need to go to New York sometime, just to research what it's like. It's a whole other culture. That's why I stick with St. Louis, Chicago, and Kansas City so much. Because I've been to those places several times. Looks like Memphis will be added to the list, as will Denver.

I need to travel more. I love it, and I never get to do it enough.

In any case, Tim, Natalie, and my brother are coming over in a couple hours and I need to do more cleaning.

I was listening to music and procrastinating writing, but my mom got up and started watching Air Force One in the family room. Now, I love Harrison Ford and Gary Oldman as much as the next person, but she has the volume cranked. So I can't listen to my lovely music and I keep getting distracted by Messrs Ford and Oldman.

Writing is hard business, you know.

My brothers (well, hopefully both of them) and Tim and Natalie are coming over tomorrow for a much needed write in. We haven't been able to have one for several weeks, so I'm excited. We always have a good time, even if Jimmy ends up talking half the time and we don't get much writing done. But if anything, it's good socializing.

Darnit, I'm hungry, and we don't have any clementines left. I need to go to the store and stockpile fruit, water flavoring (I admit, I only like unflavored water if I'm REALLY dehydrated or thirsty), cheese, and other assorted foods. But I'm lazy, don't you know.

I work at 8 on tuesday, which was precisely why I didn't want to tell anybody when my spring break was. D'oh! At least I should, in theory, get out early. I thought I would on Saturday too, and one of my coworkers got very ill and had to go home, so it didn't happen. At least I'll get a nice paycheck out of the deal for my 10 hour day and my 9 hour day. Makes up for the snowday last Tuesday, I suppose.

I'm practicing "Sunshine Again" for voice lessons and it's frustrating me to NO end. mostly because the accompaniment has absolutely nothing to do with the vocal line, which I'm only struggling through because I'm used to singing. I can't imagine how one of my fellow student is going to be able to sing it, when she could barely keep up with "The Turtle Dove" which wasn't so hard. Oh well, I'll just have to listen to it an dplay it over and over and over until I get it. And I should really get around to learning the third movement of Clementi's Sonatina in C Major.

Alright! Air force One is over, and mom and dad are going to see Penelope, which I loved when I saw it on Friday, so some peace and quiet! And some Jesus Christ Superstar!

I forgot to mention how awesome the Nobuo Uematsu concert was! It was, to put it briefly, freaking AWESOME. I mean, yeah, people scoff when you say you're going to a video game music concert, but it wasn't just any video game music. it was Uematsu-san's music, and that man is a brilliant composer. His music MADE the Final Fantasy games. Think of any incredibly memorable scene in say, Final Fantasy 7 (which I believe is the most widely played game and probably one of the most successful "recently"). Now, imagine that scene without the music accompanying it. It's incredibly hard to strip Sephiroth walking into the flames from the creepy Jenova music, or the final battle from "One Winged Angel" or Aeris' Death Scene from "Aerith's Theme". Not to mention the battle music, the chocobo theme, etc.

But what I love about Uematsu-san's music is I can write to it, and I can't write to certain artists. It just doesn't happen. But pop in a Final Fantasy soundtrack and it gets the words typed.

Also, I got to meet Uematsu, get my picture taken with him, and got to tell him he inspires me. :-) He thanked me. It was SO awesome.

I'm at 83,000 words, mostly because I'm too tired to crank out anymore tonight, and I have to get up at 5 AM tomorrow. My manager asked me when spring break was, which made me sad. Mostly because I was going to not tell anybody and have all that beautiful, valuable time to write. Oh well, at least I'll get a decent paycheck. And no school until St. Patrick's Day!

I've also been wandering my house singing, "Cut the confessions, forget the excuses, I don't understand why you're filled with remorse. All that you've said has come true with a vengeance; the mob turned against him, you've bet the right horse" in the Annas' piercing voice that I've discovered I can do. Yes, that's my audition "song" for JCS. Here's hoping I get the part! I've already been a man in a musical, what's one more male role?

Anyway, I need to go to bed so I can get up and not die tomorrow. I'm hanging with Ashley tomorrow night, because I sorely need some interaction with someone not related to me.

I just checked my wordcount, and it is exactly 77,777. I was heartily amused.

So by my approximation, I have about 20 days (with the writing 2K a day schedule) to go before I finish The River of the Gods. Of course, I won't be able to write on Saturday or Sunday, really, as I'm going to Chicago. Hopefully. I'm not sure yet. My manager hinted I might not get out by 11 (which is when my brother wants to leave). If I can't get out by noon, I can't go to Chicago, and I'll have wasted $175, because of poor planning. So yes, I'm hoping my coworkers come back to work tomorrow and Friday.

Getting back to what I was talking about, I may make it up on Friday and Monday, or maybe Sunday night if we get back in time. Or I could be productive on the ride there and write some. It will probably be too dark on the way back.

I love Chicago, and kind of wish I wasn't staying just one night.

I'm at 71K on RoG, and it makes me quite happy. Things are pulling together, characters are making realizations, I'm laying groundwork for the sequels, and I've found another fun character in Bramley, Astraia's brother.

I'm getting more and more nervous about querying agents. Worrying, that is, if my first few chapters are good enough. I like my later ones, but I don't know how I feel about the first one. The Melir scene reads well to me, and to those who've read it, but what if it doesn't read well to an agent, or an editor? Or maybe I'm just being paranoid. And if I don't sell RoG, I'll just write Cassie's and Hattie's story and try to sell that one (I LOVE Cassie and Hattie and Sage and Robin. They go with my other series that I wrote a nursery rhyme for).

I'm going to go eat my clementines and try to hammer out 400 words before bed. As much as I want to read more Dresden Files or House of Cards.

So I decided I need to find an agent. After all, what's the point of trying to get published if I'm doing it all myself (and plus, it's really really hard to be picked up by a major publisher if you don't have an agent). My only problem is I have absolutely no idea where to look. I've been reading up on Writer Beware which is immensely helpful. I recommend browsing and reading through that site to ANY aspiring writer.

Well, since I'm only about half done with the River of the Gods, I've got time. Hell, I've got my whole life, so whatevs. :-)

Maybe I'll peruse the SFWA site's section on writing. Maybe they'll have some information on finding an agent. Can't hurt!

In other news, I'm nearly at the 50K mark. Technically, by my estimation, I won't hit the halfway mark until I'm at 65K, but hey, what's 15K? I can write that in a week and a half.

I'm nearly at 36K on the River of the Gods. I'm definitely hitting my stride on this novel, which is squee worthy. I remember hitting the stride on Kyaharen and what a relief that was. It was nothing to write 5K in a sitting.

Also, I unintentionally created another main character. Seriously, I had no plans to have another major player, but it just worked out so neatly that I refused to change it. So, it was a pleasant unintentional addition. Woot.

I saw Jesus Christ Superstar at the Fox last night, with Ted Neeley, and was incredibly inspired for My Lovely. I think I'll work like woah on that after I finish River. Ted Neeley may be 65, but he still rocks hardcore style. I originally said Drew Sarich would be the inspiration for JOsh's voice, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to put young Ian Gillam/Ted Neeley as Josh. Because Aubin=Drew through and through. Aubin is my favorite character in the entire series, and his personality just screams Drew Sarich's voice (if that makes any sense), while Josh can kick it like Gillam. Hah. Wow, that was random and rambly and pointless. And I'm pretty sure Idina Menzel is my inspiration for Liz. RANDOM.

I'm going to go charge up the laptop and read more of Iron Kissed and ignore the Superbowl.

I am at 17001 words on the River of the Gods. 47 pages.

Which means I wrote about 11 pages today. Yee lawdy, that was a lot of writing, most of it done in the past hour and a half, due to being too busy with other things.

I really hope I can keep up this pace after school starts. I'll be incredibly busy with practicing piano and my singing, not to mention trying not to fail out of Algebra, and making vincent Valentine armor (speaking of which, I need to make that within the next couple of weeks) and work. Phew, my life is crazy this semester. who knows, maybe that's what I need.

I can't wait to have this Associate's Degree nailed. That's all I'm asking, is an Associate's. A Bachelor's would be nice, but who am I kidding? I barely can stand school and don't forsee myself committing any longer when most of the kids I graduated high school with will be getting their Bachelor's in the next couple years. Bleh.

Back on topic of writing, this time around the River of the Gods is getting increasily easier to write as I'm getting closer to the point where I had to quit the first time around. This says very good things. Now that I have Jin and Astraia having met, it'll only get more easier as I can put my ideas to good use. Yay!

So I wrote a folk song to stick into the River of the Gods. And I got bored yesterday when I got off work early so I made up a tune. I recorded the tune. Now all I have to do is sing the song and voila, folksong. I don't know how folksy the tune is, but dangit, it's my world, I can do whatever I want. 

Instead of writing or doing my latest installment of My Immortal, I hauled the DVD player downstairs and watched Sin City. It was terribly counter-productive, but I really don't care. So I wrote about a page this morning and once again procrastinated by sleeping in later than I had intended. Oh the joys of being me. HOpefully I'll find time to write with my four classes this semester, in addition to doing Jesus Christ Superstar and going out of town a few times. Who knows. 

I"d better get to introducing Jin in my story. Or at least the Healers. Or somebody. Ugh. I have to make this plot less complex. It's too complex for a standalone book. And there's one side plot thingy that I'm wondering if it really works in the grand scheme of the plot. I might be able to figure it out. Because I really don't want to lose it. 

Ugh, better get some writing done before work.

 EDIT: Curse you Rich text....

Okay, first post in this journal that I've had for some time now but never bothered to do anything with.

Herein I'll post my trials and tribulations of writing and my quest to be published.

Fascinating, no?